As Gregor Samsa woke one morning from uneasy dreams he found himself in his bed, transformed into a member of the Accounts Receivable department

As I currently write, I am sitting in a warehouse somewhere in the center of the Puyallup Fair grounds. This will be day 3. For the uninitiated, the Puyallup Fair is the "Pacific Northwest's ultimate entertainment event," if one's idea of an entertainment event is farm animals, rodeos, fried foods, and nauseating roller coasters, interspliced with concerts from the likes of Hilary Duff, Kenny Rogers and Creedence Clearwater Revisited. (Hilary Duff tickets are $59.50. I hate ya, sweet Jesus). I'm handling the accounts receivable for a company that controls the concessions and novelties for the fair. I do not know how I got here. I read Karl Marx and am prone to making snobbish comments about your musical tastes. I'm an English major living in Seattle. When I explain how I got this job and what it entails, I feel like someone explaining how they ended up in porn. "I needed the money, I was desperate..." so on and so forth. This is my Gregor Samsa transformed into a monstrous vermin moment.

The Fair has given me a surprisingly large amount of free time, with high speed internet access, as my actual duties thus far take up about 2 hours of a 10-12 hour day. Going into this I thought that this thing we call blog may have to die down for the majority of the month of September, but as it currently stands, I may be able to produce a record output. Huzzah!!! I hope that you, my loyal readers, are as excited as I am. My mutton chops are twitching with anticipation. Hopefully at some point in the near future, I will finish my current pet project, a long-winded, rambling piece with loads of research on the nature of sacrifice bunting as it pertains to the 2006 Seattle Mariners, in terms of run expectancy, and possibly even win expectancy. That excites you, doesn't it? That tingling you feel, that's the excitement, or possibly an oncoming cold sore. I have drinken entirely too much coffee.